If I didn't have a girlfriend.....

Why is that quite possibly the most frusterating line that I have ever heard. Well, there are others, but let's not get into that. Oh, hell let's just do it now. i love "safe" guys. Defined as guys in relationships that I can totally flirt with and not have to worry about anything, but come on. Don't be completely awesome people and then let that out. Because, even if it's only for a second, i feel like i've betrayed someone for for thinking about a relationship iwth someone who is already in a relationship and i realize that a year ago i wouldn't have given a shit but still. Moving on.....

Rose is great. Quite possibly the funnest place that I visit regularly. Shhh....don't tell them that. Which they're going to find out because they read this. Oh well. Hi guys. What's up? Hope your hangovers are going as well as mine. lol.

I slept all day yesterday. Ohmygod was it great. I haven't done that in a long little while. Ahhhhh, sweet sleep. Skinnerfest was cool. Someone had an Ashlee Simpson additction and they played the entire CD. It's not that I don't like her, it's that I like her in small doses. Then this guy started to play. He had a sweet guitar. Ahhhhhh, guys and guitars. Oooooo, we went to Olive Garden. I so kleptoed two glasses. Cute wine glasses for my collection. Mom would be so proud, or maybe not. The play was good. Kudos to all of the cast. Bur really to Stephanie and Katie for being awesome and shhhhhhing me during the performance. I've inherited my mothers laugh.

Cast Party.....should I talk about this? It was great. It was kinda like frosh. year. I mean towards the end. I was a lot drunker than I have been, well since July. (NOTE TO SELF: WTF mate? I really hate how my anger eventually consumes me when I drink. There's always a point when I don't want to be touched or around people that remind me of other people. So I cling to someone safe. I thought that I was over all of this. I know that this is going to take time and that I shouldn't force being okay, but still. I don't like being unhappy. But more, I don't like that Cale still has the ability to effect my life. I just want it all to be done. It's been five monthes. I hate boys. No I don't. I really should thank Cale for all of this in the end. I'm a much stronger and better person for the experience. Bastard. But it was my decision to not tell him until after everything was over. Had things not happened the way they had though I just wouldn't have come back from Winter Break. I would have stayed in Albion and been a typical graduate of CN. Go Cougars. Wow, I'm really apathetic today. And this tangent? So not what I should be blogging about.)

But the party was great. 99 Apples and Carmel syrup. I love alcohol. I love cigars. I almost had an orgasm from a back massage. It was great. Thank you Bob, Gage, and Elliot. I have to go. I have to drive to Indy soon. Thank you everyone for a great weekend.