Cliques................

Okay, so this has been rolling around in my head for a while.....

I think it's interesting how the social dynamics of high school effect our friendships. Who we're friends with, what we do, the organizations that we're in. For instance, in High School I was very defined by the organizations that I was in: PRIDE (parents resource institute for drug education), Central Noble Theatre Company, National Honor Society, Prom Corp., Student Government, Mentoring, Soccer, Mat Maids, color guard...everything. That's who I was. And I was friends with the people that it was socially acceptable for me to be friends with. The popular drama kids, other NHS kids, the Stud. Gov. Reps on my committee, the rest of prom corp.....but I wasn't supposed to be friends with my soccer boys or the wrestlers or my PRIDE kids. It wasn't acceptable for me to talk to the kids that I mentored during school. Why? Because someone 50 years ago said that we shouldn't? or because we were socially different? We weren't.

In the last couple years I've realized how defined I actually was, despite my belief that I was one of those people that was friends with everyone. Truthfully, I did have friends in a lot of different cliques, but what about the "Goths" that I was friends with before? Granted, I was a different person with much different values, but still.....Why wasn't I still friends with them? Were we really that different? I think about all of the friendships that were lost because of what was socially acceptable....but I digress.......

Everytime I go home there are specific people that I know I want to visit. The list goes
1. Parents
2. Cara
3. Russ and Jean Smith
4. Petts Family
5. Riddle Family

I'm not saying that it actually happens this way or that I get to see each group on the list, but that's generally how it works out. I'd like to focus on Russ and Jean. I played soccer with their son, Joe, for two years. He was my sweep. (I've talked aobut him recently.) I love them, they're kind of second parents. I normallyhango ut with Jean for a couple hours talking about college and Albion and basically filling each other in. Then we go visit Russ at the shop (they're starting an antique store). Sooner or later we run into Joe and the two of us will talk for a couple hours and then I'll head out. It's fun because I've gotten to watch him grow up and help him through some hard times. It's nice that we've managed to be friends after everything.......high school drama. But I guess there has always been that void where we're friends, but it's still not accepted because of the High School restrictions.

He graduated this year. He's amazingly intelligent. I went to his graduation party before I headed back to Indy two weeks ago. It still kind of surprises me. When I walked in he ran across the room, picked me up and swung me in circles. he was so happy that I had made it. There were some wierd looks from people who obviously thought that I shouldn't have been there. (You wouldn't believe how cliquish our high school was.)Before I left he made me promise that since he's only going to be 45 minutes away that we'd hang out a lot.

I'm not sure if I buy into it. He's not a frat boy. he enjoys learning too much. And he's not into the drinking, partying, sex scene. I guess I just wonder how Wabash is going to change him. I hope that he doesn't change too much. I miss hanging out with people who actually know me and that I feel comfortable with. I've only had that with Kimmy since I came to college.

It's ironic. I never trusted my best friend with half of my personality...maybe I knew all along that we really weren't friends at all. We were friends because we were both there and had similar interests.....but it takes more than that to be friends. How can you trust someone who admits that everything they do is an act? You always wonder if they're professions of friendship are facades too.......food for thought I guess.

Lata..........:)