Seeing Red...

I'm seein red
Don't think you'll have to see my face again
don't have much time for sympathy
Cuz it never happened to me
You feelin blue now
I think you bit off more than you could chew
And now it's time to make a choice
And all I wanna hear is your...

I'm kind of emotionally drained today. I feel like I don't have the capacity to sustain emotions. It's actually kind of scary. I've always felt that I don't have the capcity to feel true love or true hate. I guess that it's all fueled by my inability to sustain any emotion for a substantial period of time. It's true. Trust me. When was the last time that you've seen me have one emotion for a period of longer than 2 hours? I bounce all over the place. I can't even stay mad about something, I just stop caring...

So follow the leader down
And swallow your pride and drown
When there's no place left to go
Maybe thats when you will know
Follow the leader down
And swallow your pride and drown
When theres no place left to go
Maybe thats when you will know

...maybe it's just that the majority of my emotional space is centered on anticipation. I'm saving up energy to handle it all later? There's the bachelorette party the 24/25 of June. Which, hopefully, should go well. Personally, I don't think that any of the girls are going to drive 3 hours and spend about $100 on Sherie, but I guess I'm in the minority. It's a lot to ask of them. They're not that good of friends...

And foolish lies well can't you see
I tried to compromise
Cuz what you say ain't always true
And I can see the tears in your eyes
And what you said now
Can't stop the words from running through my head
And what I do to get through to you
But you'd only do it again

...I think back to Middle School and High School. I remember Cheerleading and dances and jobs, but what did we really have in common? Were we even friends? or just people placed together for a series of events that adapted to each others' presence? God, how sad is that? We've proven repeatedly that we aren't truely friends, we just keep hanging on. It's pathetic. I hated people like this in High School. They held on to who and what they were and never grew up. I think that none of us want to admit that we weren't ever really friends. You wouldn't treat people that are/were your best friends like this. Would you?...

So follow the leader down
And swallow your pride and drown
When there's no place left to go
Maybe that's when you will know
Follow the leader down
And swallow your pride and drown
When there's no place left to go
Maybe that's when you will know

...But I'm just as bad aren't I? I guess we really were the bitch clan weren't we?...

Well I confess, I don't know what to make from all this mess
Don't have much time for sympathy
But it never happened to me
You Feelin down I don't know where i'll be when you come around
And now it's time to make a choice,
And all I wanna hear is your voice...

...I'm horid. And repetitively redundant. (lol. 10 pts if you caught that) But, hell, I like me. My personalities and I get along just fine as long as we all keep to the time share rules of the body.