Self Apathy is Bad

What is it asshole day?
If every person I've talked to today hadn't been an asshole my day would have been great. I don't think I should have gotten out of bed today. That's really when it all started. Housing is being an asshat. They're saying that my lease is up June 1. But the contract clearly states that I'm there until August 9. WTF mate? Stupid people call me at 8 to tell me this. Granted that I was up working on my feet positions in pointe, but still... GRRRRRRRRRRRRR. So I've been shoving my "pets" off of icebergs all day. (They're linked in here so check them out!)
Thank the powers that be that I was wearing a cute and very short black skirt today. It allowed me to talk my way out of a parking ticket...in my boss's car.

Maybe it hasn't been all that bad. A lot of it may just be my attitude. Actually I know that that's what most of it is. I feel like a prisoner. I'm trapped in an apartment that I hate, a job that sucks, and classes. This is my summer. (pouting) I'm looking forward to Texas. Eric and I are going to drive down to see Angie. I miss that girl. I think I've actually figured something out. At some point this weekend, with drunken wisdom, I said that I don't like my friends because they're stupid and immature. That's so true. I feel like a mother to the majority of the people around me. That was one of the things that I hated so much about past friendships. (AKA HS and Frosh. year) Thank God for Kimmer, Colleen, Anna, and the other stable people in my life. My rocks. The people that I can always go to when I need to be sane or escape.

SIDENOTE: My Launch is actually being awesome today. Lots of Simple Plan, Linkin Park, Relient K and Green Day. For once they're actually playing my mood.

I'm kind of in the middle of a "thing" right now. I hate drama. So why go somewhere where I would obviously be 1/2 of the cause of a crap load of drama? And maybe things wouldn't be "drama" and everything would be fine, but I know the other individual involved. I also know myself. The shit would hit the fan. I'm not the same person anymore, but most of all I don't want anything to do with this individual. I realize that she's trying to make things work. I do. But you can't fix something when you refuse to admit that you are part of the problem. I know that I'm being cold and heartless. It's not that. I'm protecting myself at all costs. I can't go back to being that person again. I didn't care about.....anything? I look at who I was freshman year and want to smack myself. I remember weekends by a guys name. I hate myself for that. I didn't have respect for me, them, or their girlfriends. I've been in all three parts of that equation. (shakes head) But that's not who I am anymore. I actually have respect for myself and my work.

I can't go back to being that. No, I won't go back to that.

Is this F***ed up or what? I think I'm taking the rest of the day off. Or at least taking a break. Later...................